Things To Do
While Waiting for Final Fantasy XI to Install
J. Michael Neal
The set-up process
for FFXI and the PlayOnline software is one of the longest,
most complex, most confusing things you’ll ever face. It’s like ten
Ultimecias and a dozen Omega Weapons all rolled into one. It’s an
unending maze of registration codes and forms that will call for at
least two 40 minute+ downloads and installations. Now, you could
just sit there and wait for the little bar at the bottom of the
screen to fill up, or you can get your ass up from in front of the
TV and do something useful in the meantime. If you chose the more
productive option, here are some suggestions for killing time while
Final Fantasy XI installs:
Bake a cake for
Read the huge-ass
Take out garbage.
Princess Leia in that slave girl outfit for about five minutes.
items on eBay.
Air guitar the
entire Transformers theme song.
to next GTA game.
Doctor Who tapes.
Teen Hunger Force episodes.
Finally learn how
to approximate the Buffy theme on the sitar.
Wonder where you
left your favorite hat.
from that whole “anime thing” now that it’s gone “mainstream”.
pawned your favorite hat to cover the first month’s subscription
for FFXI and quietly shed a tear.
Bitch about how
much better games use to be back in the “good old days”.
grown beard after you decide it looks too Alan Moore-ish.
with an old, old friend – direct sunlight.
Leave yet another
bitter message on Hideo Kojima’s answering machine.
seven Final Fantasy games.
Hold an actual
conversation with a real, live person.
Study for exams…
nah, maybe later…
meaning of life.
Get a headache
from all those deep thoughts and go lay down for a while.
Get a shower for
how much you’ve spent on video games in your lifetime.
breakdown after number is finally tallied.
Drown sorrows in
a GameStop shopping spree.
pointless list of things to do while waiting for Final Fantasy
XI to install.